Sunday, January 2, 2011

My mind just won't shut up

2011. Another year. I'm alive. I think I'm alive, no maybe I'm just breathing. I'm thinking, therefore I exist right? Do I merely want to exist? No I want to live. But how? Have I been living or just going through the motions? Is going through the motions living? Or should I rage against the machine? Shake up the status quo! Would anyone care? Would it make a difference? Can a man change his stars? Can he challenge destiny or the wheels of fate? Take a stand in a world where everyone knowingly or not is marching to the beat of one drum, DESTRUCTION.
Fight against the dying of the light. Be a light in a world that hates the light. Be alone in the world yet never alone. Be the warrior who carries into battle the weight of the world, one that cares not for him. Or turn your back and get in line. Choice is yours. Do we really have a choice? Free will or no will? Or wills bound to a darkness we no longer see. One we are desensitized by, one we love!
Tired, weary I grow. How I long to be on the mountain top instead of this baron valley. This desert of questions. a foul with the stench of those who are rotting here. I to am becoming one of them. Zombie, the terror of it all. No no, I have purpose, I am not mindless. No for if I were mindless this wouldn't exist. The words here wouldn't, the questions, the experiences, the journey. Ugh if I hear any of their music one more time. Stay focused, a beast is before you. You can hear his ramblings. Growling and gnawing on the corpses of those here. The sky turns black. Thunder ringing in my ears. Flashes of lightning shake me to the core. Come beast I fear you no more than I fear myself... Myself.

6 comments:

  1. Does venting make you feel better?

    ReplyDelete
  2. I dont know about everyone but I feel this way sometimes. Like were just going the motions but not really living. That Im not serving God's purpose for me. I know there is more to life then what people on a whole think or care about. It's easy to get swallowed up by this life. Anyways I dont know if this has anything to do with what your saying here, but thats what I got from it. Your a great writer!

    ReplyDelete
  3. I agree with Jess. You are a great writer. Glad to see you are writing again.

    ReplyDelete
  4. thank you all. Its all I can do lately.things are rough and not going my way so, again thank you .

    ReplyDelete
  5. I hope things get better, I know that feeling. I hope your writing gives you some release, it does for me.

    ReplyDelete