Frustration

So here we are again, another Spring season rolls in and I feel the same as I always do, alone.  This time though instead of self pity or depression I am angry and fed up.  What the fuck is wrong with me?  That's the question I want answered.  What the fuck makes me unworthy of the one and only thing I want out of this life?  No seriously, I am tired of going on Facebook and seeing everyone else throwing their love story out there.  I am tired of being the fucking president of the Friend Zone.  I am tired of being the good guy only to have my heart trampled upon.  I'm tired of observing assholes men get women and not even appreciate the woman they are with going so far as the cheat on them regularly.   If I hear from a female one more time that I am a great guy and will make someone happy one day I might just commit murder.  If one more person asks me why I'm single or feels the need to remind me that I'm not getting any younger.   Ya know what I have no fucking idea why I'm single.  Maybe ask any girl I have ever liked who thought I wasn't good enough for them and they can give you the answer because I have no fucking idea.  While your at it ask them why they got with scumbags a, b and c and still wouldn't give me a shot.  This is years of frustration just exploding.  I am tired of playing second fiddle, tired of being treated as if I don't exist.  So what us the solution?  Maybe just be a dock.  Maybe say all the right things just to get into a girls pants and then bounce.  Maybe I should just stop actually caring about someone and just say fuck it and treat them all like pieces of meat.  Maybe then I'll get something, some reaction.  All I know is I'm beyond angry that other people get what I crave and so easily and don't even cherish it.  Ooh and to the females I am absolutely tired of your lies.  Don't be nice to me to save my feelings in some vanity bullshit.   Don't you dare string me along because you like the attention and yet have zero desire to be with me.  Don't you dare tell me you care about me when you only care about what I can do for you.  I've been through it all and I've heard EVERY LIE imaginable.  Fuck you.  The truth is you don't deserve me, yes for the fucking first time in my life I put myself on the fucking pedestal.  I am better than that shit for brains you date, I am better than his money or his ride but you'll never know  although I'm sure I'm going to hear about how unhappy you are, FUCK YOU.  Save it for Oprah!  From now on if I don't get the love and respect I deserve or if I suspect you of being shady you are gone, fuck off.  I'm not going to go that extra mile for you when you wouldn't even move a muscle for me, fuck you.  This is what you want isn't it?  You want a "man" right?   Ya know someone who just wants to fuck you whenever he wants and bail when you really need him.  Oh better yet why not go fuck a married dude because fuck anyone else out there who you may hurt with your selfish lust.  I have seen and heard it all, I've been lied to, bullshitted, cheated on, dumped via Facebook etc.  Yet ya know what makes me better than anyone you will ever know, my capacity to love,  100%, never begging for a raincheck.  Despite all the shit I have had to endure I know in my heart that when I meet that one and only she will have all of me, I will love her like nothing else in the world exists,  because I know I can.  I know how to treat a woman, how to be a man who will edify her, support her, make her laugh, hold her when she needs it, I KNOW I AM THAT MAN!  For all of you who think I am not worth shit, a final fuck you.  The loss is ultimately yours.